January 10, 2009

Let It Be

Today, after a two-hour schlep to the grocery store and back, with windshield wipers that are apparently on strike, I swerved and spun through our unplowed driveway, finally sliding to a stop in our just-big-enough parking spot.

I went for three items; I came back with seven. I was sweltering from going in and out of the store twice (because the first time I tried to leave I realized I had forgotten to buy sleds- grr!), bracing kamikaze snow outside and hot, dry air inside. And I do love my boots, but darn if they don't keep my feet at exactly 120 degrees. A bit too warm for my liking.

I clambered at my flimsy plastic bags- already in the process of spilling my newly-purchased goods onto the wet, dingy winter car floor- and fell out of the Accord. The Accord that, to date, I have logged over twelve hours pushing heavy snow off and scraping the unappreciative windows of this winter. With snow flying in my face, I mentally prepared not to explode when N inevitably asked, "How was the trip?"

It was then that I had a completely novel idea (for me): could I go one whole day without complaint?

Now, I know at other times I might advocate this concept for other reasons, spiritual for example: as in, 'try to ask questions and be more compassionate before you get annoyed at their behavior.'

But this is not one of those times. This is a purely self-centered, self-preservative suggestion. The goal is to inhibit oneself from constantly seeing the half empty glass or only half-done pile of laundry. The goal is to keep oneself sane, or at least calm enough in her insanity to remain composed.

So, if it's going to snow twelve inches and that means people are going to drive very liberally (i.e. no turn signals or lane adherence), just let it be. Let the snow do to people's driving what it's going to do and I will accept this. I have enough experience with these kind of conditions to know just to stay home and not make myself crazy- and hoarse from yelling at them!

Here's another one: I know that no matter how much I plan out my day/week/month/trip/job, something is going to go wrong. Let it be. I should just accept that I can't control anything, so I should not be bothered when things go how they go. The thing is, they're not going wrong or going differently, because they're just going how they are going to go.

I'm not talking about letting everything be, so don't think I've gone into some shallow new age pool. All I'm saying is that, if you know that the grocery store is swamped on Saturday afternoons then go on Friday night if you can. If you know that not having everything when you walk out the door annoys you and makes you feel old and forgetful, triple check before you leave!

I'm not telling you anything you don't know. In fact, pretty much everyone could figure this out. But if you're like me- a certified hothead who is far too easily annoyed by insignificant things about life- you can cause yourself to be focused on all that sucks in life (inconsequential things, mind you) instead of everything worthy of your thinking time.

I'll try this method first and let you know if it works. For example, if Blogger refuses to save or publish this blog for me I will just save it somewhere and try again later (instead of smashing my keyboard in frustration until my janky computer shuts itself down- oops!).

Take a cue from this guy; he doesn't sweat anything.


cityfarmer said...

pousseaaaapousse....my kinda style.
I'm hurdling over the complaining thang...mostly concerning this old house....it can come crashing in at times.

We ARE going to tackle the bathroom in the spring.

We've been seen loitering over at "Re-store!

Parisienne Farmgirl said...

Though I suck at taking this advice and do enjoy an occasional keyboard smashing or fantasize of tossing my scale in front of a moving semi you are of course spot on as usual. So, I'll let it be but not before saying that I was once given this advice and it has haunted me even to this point where I found your post.
Once I was bitching (can I say that on this blog?) about the negative things happening on my job and I was advised to consider those things part of the job description, advised that if I did that then I would not be surprised with irritating clients and people who would not return phone calls etc. It really is great advice, as long as your can stay away from being a "laundry pile half done" kind of girl.
Very difficult indeed.

Victoria said...

It's often said that people harp the hardest to others about that which they struggle the most with themselves; I fit squarely in that description, of course..

It is difficult. And I offer this post as an encouragement for edification, not a rebuke of any kind. My unpublished resolution is to be more a part of the "community of believers," to be less self-centered. So you can take this as my first attempt.

You can say anything on this blog, my dear. :)


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