May 7, 2012
May 7th, 2012
Dear Sofia,
Summer is on it's way, mother's day is sooner. Can we go to the botanical garden again this year to celebrate? You'll love it even more, what with your new habit of smelling things, not to mention wanting to pick flowers... every time you see them.
Of course, "flowers" are often dandelions, violets or tree blossoms - all suitable for plucking. At the gardens we might have our hands full...or else you will.
I hope the dreary rain will finally let up next Sunday! I'm looking forward to spending some time with my little tulip.
Love,
Momma
April 6, 2012
April 6th, 2012
Dear Sofia,
My sweet baby at eighteen months... I get to know you more each day, and I love who you are becoming!
Love,
Mama
February 21, 2012
February 21st, 2012
Dear Sofia,
Our dinner conversation tonight...
Mama: Sofia, are you all done eating dinner?
You: Fork!
M: Yes, it's a fork. Are you all done with dinner?
You: Bubby (bunny)! Play!
M: Yes, bunny is an 'after-dinner' friend you can play with. Are you done making a mess with dinner?
You: Messy. Baf (bath)? Bubble?!
M: You had one last night, so let's read some books.
You: Bop! Bop! Bop! [Your favorite book is "Bee-Bim Bop," about a Korean food. We read it at least twice through, daily. I have it memorized.]
M: I think I need a 'bee-bim break.' [But we read it anyway.]
When's the last time someone got excited about using a fork, having a special friend, playing, taking a bath with bubbles, or reading a good book?
You're 16 months tomorrow and you've already got enthusiasm for the right things. And I love you for it.
Love,
Mama
January 22, 2012
January 26th, 2012
Dear Sofia,
Why are you walking around on your tip toes? Maybe you will want to be a ballerina and I won't need to chide you into it. Oh, would it were...
Love,
Mom
Why are you walking around on your tip toes? Maybe you will want to be a ballerina and I won't need to chide you into it. Oh, would it were...
Love,
Mom
January 21, 2012
January 21st, 2012
Dear Sofia,
You've always loved water, since you were a little one.
Maybe it's because I had my heart set on a water birth.. maybe because I was a minnow myself growing up in 10,000 lakes country... maybe because your daddy is a skiing - water and frozen water - aficionado.
You were born at a hospital two blocks away from a lake, and spent many afternoon stroller rides alongside a lake too. That's just what living on an isthmus does to you, I guess. For living in the landlocked midwest we certainly have more than our fair share of H2O.
We only got to take you swimming once last summer due to our fear of late-summer "bloom" (meaning, bacteria that flourishes in the warmest waters). So we settle for lots of baths during these chilly days.
No sooner have I turned on the water than you come running. Even if it's the sink faucet, you have to find out if it's time for a "baf." If it is, you ask about a thousand times if it's hot. I make sure it's room temperature at most. It's far too cold if you ask me!
You love to play with the water, filling up cups and emptying them out again. The introduction of a small yellow saucepan and spatula has given you new activities - now, in addition to pouring, you can stir.
The one thing you hate is having the shampoo rinsed from your hair. Lying back in the water makes you panic and I don't know why. Second to hair rinsing is when it's time to be done. But, the owl towel (which is fun to use and say) has helped a little. Still, I think you'd be happy to wrinkle away in your chilly water for hours if I let you. Silly girl.
Love,
Momma
January 20th, 2012
Dear Sofia,
Today was your lil' cousin Hoolie's 2nd birthday! Her mama and I are hoping you two will be two peas in a pod as you grow up. How could you not be? You're both the perfect combination of scrappy n sweet. Just like your mamas.
Happy birthday Juliette! We love you to pieces.
Love,
Auntie Victoria (aka Momma to Sofia)
January 14, 2012
January 14th, 2012
Dear Sofia,
It's a challenge every day to slow it all down, tune it all out and just think.
Your dad doesn't have this problem; he can think about something for hours, days, weeks. He can easily compartmentalize. Granted, all the big things never get completely shut out of his mind either. They just simmer on the back burner.
He's also relatively impervious to all things pop culture. He chooses what he wants to know about, as if he has ear plugs permanently set in, blocking out all the nonesense that is the world.
Me, I'm not so fortunate. Why do I know lyrics to songs I don't even like? Why do I know what celebrities are together (and when they inevitable divorce, the supposed reasons why)? Why can't I remember important things like the time of an appointment, or the check for daycare, or when the last time I had my teeth cleaned was, or when I started this new set of contacts?
The built-in martyr complex that comes along with motherhood tells me that I'm always thinking of how other people need to be taken care of, which is why I can't seem to take care of myself. But that isn't true.
I could go to bed earlier, get up earlier, leave earlier, and then I wouldn't be habitually late for work. I could sleep more, eat a more balanced diet and work out regularly, and then I wouldn't be so ingratiatingly self-deprecating.
So why don't I do those things? I could be a better mom if I didn't neglect myself so much. And not in an "I deserve this shopping spree because I'm stressed" way of tending to myself. If I engaged in activities I like - writing, fashion, cooking, reading, travel - maybe I wouldn't be so bored with myself... and end up disliking myself so much.
We recently went to lunch for work to meet our new boss. I couldn't think of a single thing to say, to anyone. Now, I don't think I have much in common with them, but it used to be easier to manufacture conversation. The only time I perk up is when someone asks me about you. I love you to pieces, baby, but you can't be all I've got.
More to follow...
Love,
Momma
It's a challenge every day to slow it all down, tune it all out and just think.
Your dad doesn't have this problem; he can think about something for hours, days, weeks. He can easily compartmentalize. Granted, all the big things never get completely shut out of his mind either. They just simmer on the back burner.
He's also relatively impervious to all things pop culture. He chooses what he wants to know about, as if he has ear plugs permanently set in, blocking out all the nonesense that is the world.
Me, I'm not so fortunate. Why do I know lyrics to songs I don't even like? Why do I know what celebrities are together (and when they inevitable divorce, the supposed reasons why)? Why can't I remember important things like the time of an appointment, or the check for daycare, or when the last time I had my teeth cleaned was, or when I started this new set of contacts?
The built-in martyr complex that comes along with motherhood tells me that I'm always thinking of how other people need to be taken care of, which is why I can't seem to take care of myself. But that isn't true.
I could go to bed earlier, get up earlier, leave earlier, and then I wouldn't be habitually late for work. I could sleep more, eat a more balanced diet and work out regularly, and then I wouldn't be so ingratiatingly self-deprecating.
So why don't I do those things? I could be a better mom if I didn't neglect myself so much. And not in an "I deserve this shopping spree because I'm stressed" way of tending to myself. If I engaged in activities I like - writing, fashion, cooking, reading, travel - maybe I wouldn't be so bored with myself... and end up disliking myself so much.
We recently went to lunch for work to meet our new boss. I couldn't think of a single thing to say, to anyone. Now, I don't think I have much in common with them, but it used to be easier to manufacture conversation. The only time I perk up is when someone asks me about you. I love you to pieces, baby, but you can't be all I've got.
More to follow...
Love,
Momma
January 3, 2012
December 31st, 2011
Dear Sofia,
The beginning of your second year just started and it's coming to a close already. We had the neighbors over for NYE, scattered confetti and you admired the balloons - as you always do. You brought everyone joy with your giggles - as you always do.
You continually surprise me with what you know and how your personality comes out in little ways. Once a snuggler, you're now much harder to pin down; running from here to there, finding baby doll to feed, vacuuming, playing in the fort.. a busy girl doesn't always have time for mom and dad's affection.
But I instituted something called the "nose smoosh" several months ago, and you still oblige me (and now, daddy too). If I ask you for a smoosh, you wrinkle your tiny nose and go in like you're asking for a smooch. Usually you're not satisfied with just one. That's ok with me.
Happy new year to my baby girl.
Love,
Momma
The beginning of your second year just started and it's coming to a close already. We had the neighbors over for NYE, scattered confetti and you admired the balloons - as you always do. You brought everyone joy with your giggles - as you always do.
You continually surprise me with what you know and how your personality comes out in little ways. Once a snuggler, you're now much harder to pin down; running from here to there, finding baby doll to feed, vacuuming, playing in the fort.. a busy girl doesn't always have time for mom and dad's affection.
But I instituted something called the "nose smoosh" several months ago, and you still oblige me (and now, daddy too). If I ask you for a smoosh, you wrinkle your tiny nose and go in like you're asking for a smooch. Usually you're not satisfied with just one. That's ok with me.
Happy new year to my baby girl.
Love,
Momma
December 28, 2011
December 28th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
When I think of all the stupid 2-minute-long videos I watch and then remember I have this blog for you, it makes me cringe. What am I wasting my time on?
Yes, it's ok to admit that there are things in the world besides you that matter to me. Politics, religious issues, societal woes... fashion... But it's not as if everything I spend time on is important. I mean, really! How self-righteous would I be to pretend that what takes me away from "Sofia blog time" is essential?
I will try to write something to you every day. And I will try to do it without expectations (which is really difficult, because I have high ones for my writing and presentation). I will try to write without so much self-consciousness. What a wonderful thing that you don't know what that is.
So... all that aside...
Do you know what we did for Christmas this year? We went to the 'burbs as usual, but this time saw your aunties & uncles (including Jon, who you'd never met before!), my cousins, your cousins (2/3 of them), two sets of Grammas and Grampas (or, "Namp-na" as you say) and my extended family. Whew.
When your mama (that's me) was little, we did the same thing as you and I did last week: drove to one side of the family for Christmas eve, then to the other for Christmas day. Funny how I've tried to get away from reliving memories - and toward making our own - but somehow they ended up overlapping anyway.
You were a very good girl at both houses, lovin' on everyone and letting them lavish you with attention (not that it's difficult for you). You opened all but one present before losing interest, and played with everything at least once. We dressed you up as Santa Lucia and your cousin Connor helped you by presenting the cookies. Since the crown of lights was itchy, I just held it over your head like a halo. Adorable! Thank you for doing that... we haven't had someone little enough for Lucia in a long time. In fact, the last people to do it were adults - your daddy and I!
We have yet to do Christmas at home because Daddy hasn't found the perfect gift for you. He went shopping at will (a great feat for him, trust me) but dismissed everything as not special enough. He puts great thought into everything he does. You will learn that in time.
I'm anxious for you to open your gift from me. In the meantime, I built you the table fort, complete with white lights. This morning you crawled in there with crocheted bunny and read a book to yourself. Just when I think my heart can't fill up with love for you any more, you do something like that.
Until tomorrow.
Love,
Mama
When I think of all the stupid 2-minute-long videos I watch and then remember I have this blog for you, it makes me cringe. What am I wasting my time on?
Yes, it's ok to admit that there are things in the world besides you that matter to me. Politics, religious issues, societal woes... fashion... But it's not as if everything I spend time on is important. I mean, really! How self-righteous would I be to pretend that what takes me away from "Sofia blog time" is essential?
I will try to write something to you every day. And I will try to do it without expectations (which is really difficult, because I have high ones for my writing and presentation). I will try to write without so much self-consciousness. What a wonderful thing that you don't know what that is.
So... all that aside...
Do you know what we did for Christmas this year? We went to the 'burbs as usual, but this time saw your aunties & uncles (including Jon, who you'd never met before!), my cousins, your cousins (2/3 of them), two sets of Grammas and Grampas (or, "Namp-na" as you say) and my extended family. Whew.
When your mama (that's me) was little, we did the same thing as you and I did last week: drove to one side of the family for Christmas eve, then to the other for Christmas day. Funny how I've tried to get away from reliving memories - and toward making our own - but somehow they ended up overlapping anyway.
You were a very good girl at both houses, lovin' on everyone and letting them lavish you with attention (not that it's difficult for you). You opened all but one present before losing interest, and played with everything at least once. We dressed you up as Santa Lucia and your cousin Connor helped you by presenting the cookies. Since the crown of lights was itchy, I just held it over your head like a halo. Adorable! Thank you for doing that... we haven't had someone little enough for Lucia in a long time. In fact, the last people to do it were adults - your daddy and I!
We have yet to do Christmas at home because Daddy hasn't found the perfect gift for you. He went shopping at will (a great feat for him, trust me) but dismissed everything as not special enough. He puts great thought into everything he does. You will learn that in time.
I'm anxious for you to open your gift from me. In the meantime, I built you the table fort, complete with white lights. This morning you crawled in there with crocheted bunny and read a book to yourself. Just when I think my heart can't fill up with love for you any more, you do something like that.
Until tomorrow.
Love,
Mama
October 31, 2011
October 31st, 2011
Dear Sofia,
A short entry. I owe you a hundred more, just to catch up. I will remember these days, when and where and how you took your first steps.. your first birthday party.. the "year of firsts." But you won't! You're caught up in the moments because they're YOURS.
So, I need to be more diligent about capturing them for you. Because maybe, someday, you'll ask me how you were when you were itty bitty. Pictures won't be a complete picture, you need the words.
Love you,
Mama
A short entry. I owe you a hundred more, just to catch up. I will remember these days, when and where and how you took your first steps.. your first birthday party.. the "year of firsts." But you won't! You're caught up in the moments because they're YOURS.
So, I need to be more diligent about capturing them for you. Because maybe, someday, you'll ask me how you were when you were itty bitty. Pictures won't be a complete picture, you need the words.
Love you,
Mama
September 21, 2011
September 21st, 2011
Dear Sofia,
I have expensive taste and I'm not sure why.
Neither your dad nor I grew up in homes of plenty. True, we never experienced hunger or doubted if our lights or heat would stay on through the winters. We would call that "poverty" and many in this country live steeped in it. We did receive free hot lunch at school (once a week) and ate a lot of peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, but I don't remember ever feeling like I wanted something I didn't have.
Now, that might also be credited to my parents, because we were not raised to covet other peoples' things. We shopped at the thrift store, which I never thought was strange. We got new school clothes every fall - $50 a piece to shop, then later it was bumped up to $100. When we could convince mom to give us the money early, we could shop in Chicago on our summer vacation. This was the highlight of my year because we could find unique items, and not have to dress like every one else in small town, MN.
I liked new things - who doesn't? - but was never hung up on the novelty of them, nor on brand names (except for a brief period in 7th grade when I was being influenced by my awful peer group). I simply liked things that were fun, funky and fit well. That still defines my style, though I am more conservative than I was at, say, age 17.
Sometime during late high school I developed a strong interest in high fashion, designer and couture (this is almost like costumes, but is defined by its attention to tailoring and finery). But I only liked it for the sculptural aspects and the creative mind it takes to design them. Bold graphic prints always caught my eye, no matter the designer name, as did ultra-feminine details like ruffles, pink, beading and overall delicacy.
Maybe it's my eye for finely-made items that necessarily translates into having expensive taste, and has nothing to do with how I was raised? I appreciate quality over all else. I can spot a well-made handbag and would pay hundreds for one (if I made the kind of money that requires). I don't find anything wrong with paying for what an item seems worth, be it a bag, dress, pair of shoes or even accessory.
Now, the fashion industry is a trend mill, which can inspire both positively and negatively: seeing runway fashion gets you out of a style rut, and often. But it can also influence you to compulsively spend, trying to keep up with everything you see. As if anyone past the age of 19 actually thinks that's realistic! (Or healthy.)
My penchant for expensive items just keeps biting me though. I don't need these things - far from it - but I want them. I want the structured Fendi bag, I want the Burberry trench. It's a dangerous type of thought, the desire for that which you don't need, and I have to work hard to keep it in check. Thankfully since I am nowhere close to being able to purchase anything I have my eye on, I'll never spend the money and the temptation loses it's power!
Here are a few of my current favorites.
Love, Mom
P.S. Have I already mentioned I hope you share my interest in fashion?
Here's that Fendi bag. In green, to boot.
This purple trench makes me swoon!
Classic Brit.
A little edgy. Love the jacket.
Those shoes!
That print!
The trench skirt, a new classic.
I have expensive taste and I'm not sure why.
Neither your dad nor I grew up in homes of plenty. True, we never experienced hunger or doubted if our lights or heat would stay on through the winters. We would call that "poverty" and many in this country live steeped in it. We did receive free hot lunch at school (once a week) and ate a lot of peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, but I don't remember ever feeling like I wanted something I didn't have.
Now, that might also be credited to my parents, because we were not raised to covet other peoples' things. We shopped at the thrift store, which I never thought was strange. We got new school clothes every fall - $50 a piece to shop, then later it was bumped up to $100. When we could convince mom to give us the money early, we could shop in Chicago on our summer vacation. This was the highlight of my year because we could find unique items, and not have to dress like every one else in small town, MN.
I liked new things - who doesn't? - but was never hung up on the novelty of them, nor on brand names (except for a brief period in 7th grade when I was being influenced by my awful peer group). I simply liked things that were fun, funky and fit well. That still defines my style, though I am more conservative than I was at, say, age 17.
Sometime during late high school I developed a strong interest in high fashion, designer and couture (this is almost like costumes, but is defined by its attention to tailoring and finery). But I only liked it for the sculptural aspects and the creative mind it takes to design them. Bold graphic prints always caught my eye, no matter the designer name, as did ultra-feminine details like ruffles, pink, beading and overall delicacy.
Maybe it's my eye for finely-made items that necessarily translates into having expensive taste, and has nothing to do with how I was raised? I appreciate quality over all else. I can spot a well-made handbag and would pay hundreds for one (if I made the kind of money that requires). I don't find anything wrong with paying for what an item seems worth, be it a bag, dress, pair of shoes or even accessory.
Now, the fashion industry is a trend mill, which can inspire both positively and negatively: seeing runway fashion gets you out of a style rut, and often. But it can also influence you to compulsively spend, trying to keep up with everything you see. As if anyone past the age of 19 actually thinks that's realistic! (Or healthy.)
My penchant for expensive items just keeps biting me though. I don't need these things - far from it - but I want them. I want the structured Fendi bag, I want the Burberry trench. It's a dangerous type of thought, the desire for that which you don't need, and I have to work hard to keep it in check. Thankfully since I am nowhere close to being able to purchase anything I have my eye on, I'll never spend the money and the temptation loses it's power!
Here are a few of my current favorites.
Love, Mom
P.S. Have I already mentioned I hope you share my interest in fashion?
Here's that Fendi bag. In green, to boot.
This purple trench makes me swoon!
Classic Brit.
A little edgy. Love the jacket.
Those shoes!
That print!
The trench skirt, a new classic.
August 25, 2011
August 25th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
Mama LOVES fall fashion. Love digging through all the fall runway photos, perusing the 700 page magazines and giggling over all the silliness.. you know, lots of people take fashion way too seriously, as if it were really important or could change the world.
It can't. But it is fun to check in and see what's going on with it every now and then.
Today's post is over at my (seldomly blogged on) fashion blog, One Third Life Chic.
Here's the link: 2011 Fall Fashion Preview
Love,
Mom
August 18, 2011
August 18th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
We still have no car of our own. The camry's transmission (part of the engine, what gives the power to the car so it moves) is busted, and we couldn't afford to fix it. So now we're driving a borrowed coworker's truck. We borrowed the truck, not the coworker.
And I found a car online.. but the guy won't return my phone calls or inquiries. I basically told him I would buy it upon test driving, so what gives? This is one of those times when I am truly baffled by another person's behavior.
What else? Sadly, there's nothing else going on. Mama's promotion at work so far has yielded a big fat 0 for more actual work to do. So I'm just a glorified receptionist. Mind you, I make good money for answering phones, so I'm not really complaining. Boredom is setting in as fall is just around the corner and there are no "new" plans. Last year we had you - something to look forward to, prepare for, anticipate.
Right now you might be thinking, "What about my birthday party?!" and if you are I'd be thinking you're pretty keen for a ten month old. Yes, I am planning the party. And it's gonna be great.
But I need more than that. Somewhere to go, someone to talk to, something to break in the long chain of burdens. Something funny, something inspiring. I miss the days when a painting, a song or a good book could do that for me.
I'm supposed to find hope in the Lord, and I do. I just don't get inspired by my faith. I suppose there are different kinds of faith, and I happen to have the burden-laden/heavy kind, as opposed to the lighthearted/joyful kind. Seems like the lighthearted kind is more inspired.
I'm not sure how to compartmentalize my life, put the burdens aside so I can enjoy something. Just seems like the burdens overwhelm everything else. The only thing I cherish is time with you, and right now you just want to be independent, roaming free. I don't blame you, but it stings.
Love you,
Mom
August 4, 2011
August 4th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
I haven't written in a while.. I'm sorry. I've been busy planning parts of your first birthday party! I'll post some preliminary photos soon.
We've also been enjoying the fruits of the garden. Rainbow chard, spinach, purple beans and tomatoes like crazy (or, they're green right now but we will soon have an explosion of ripe ones in three varieties). Not to mention the free raspberries from the overgrown bush of our garden neighbor (who doesn't mind that we sample them).
Next year I will plan better and hopefully be able to provide more food for you. But I'm learning! There are no limits to the garden, only my time and ability to get out there.
I wanted to mention.. we've had a lot of rain here lately. A LOT. It's one of the reasons our garden has grown so well. We are blessed here in the midwest to have pretty good soil - not too silty, sandy, loamy or acidic. We don't have too many bugs - even the Japanese beetles (I hate them!) don't like anything I've planted, thank goodness. The sun is nice and hot for long
But the rain is what has been the catalyst for our garden's success. Without it, plants would wither up. The rain is a great blessing to us.
It's not like this everywhere - God doesn't give the perfect amount of rain everywhere. Some places have too much and it destroys crops (plants in large amounts). Other places have too little, and plants dry out. Not to mention many locations that have a lot or a little rain, but the water gathered in pools to drink is dirty and unsafe to drink.
I've been thinking a lot about how blessed we are. I know I complain a lot about bad drivers (sorry you have to hear that; I am trying to curb it for your sake) and how money is tight (not enough to do much with) and other things. But we are richly given everything we need.. the car manages to survive day after day.. my job provides a lot of income for us.. the garden gives good food..
We do give some of what we have to charity. But I'd like it to be more. Here is something I'm considering right now, since I've been thinking about rain and water:
Donate to World Vision's clean water program and your donation triples
I'd like to encourage everyone who stops by this blog to contribute also. Water... such a simple and necessary element. What a wonderful thing to be able to give that gift to someone who doesn't have it.
Love,
Mom
I haven't written in a while.. I'm sorry. I've been busy planning parts of your first birthday party! I'll post some preliminary photos soon.
We've also been enjoying the fruits of the garden. Rainbow chard, spinach, purple beans and tomatoes like crazy (or, they're green right now but we will soon have an explosion of ripe ones in three varieties). Not to mention the free raspberries from the overgrown bush of our garden neighbor (who doesn't mind that we sample them).
Next year I will plan better and hopefully be able to provide more food for you. But I'm learning! There are no limits to the garden, only my time and ability to get out there.
I wanted to mention.. we've had a lot of rain here lately. A LOT. It's one of the reasons our garden has grown so well. We are blessed here in the midwest to have pretty good soil - not too silty, sandy, loamy or acidic. We don't have too many bugs - even the Japanese beetles (I hate them!) don't like anything I've planted, thank goodness. The sun is nice and hot for long
But the rain is what has been the catalyst for our garden's success. Without it, plants would wither up. The rain is a great blessing to us.
It's not like this everywhere - God doesn't give the perfect amount of rain everywhere. Some places have too much and it destroys crops (plants in large amounts). Other places have too little, and plants dry out. Not to mention many locations that have a lot or a little rain, but the water gathered in pools to drink is dirty and unsafe to drink.
I've been thinking a lot about how blessed we are. I know I complain a lot about bad drivers (sorry you have to hear that; I am trying to curb it for your sake) and how money is tight (not enough to do much with) and other things. But we are richly given everything we need.. the car manages to survive day after day.. my job provides a lot of income for us.. the garden gives good food..
We do give some of what we have to charity. But I'd like it to be more. Here is something I'm considering right now, since I've been thinking about rain and water:
Donate to World Vision's clean water program and your donation triples
I'd like to encourage everyone who stops by this blog to contribute also. Water... such a simple and necessary element. What a wonderful thing to be able to give that gift to someone who doesn't have it.
Love,
Mom
July 13, 2011
July 13th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
Is signing a document that says one-man-one-woman marriage benefits both spouses and their children in a number of ways a bad thing?
There's an uproar about a "Marriage Vow" political officials have been presented with and their interest in or refutation of what it contains. Here's part of the preamble:
"Enduring marital fidelity between one man and one woman protects innocent children, vulnerable women, the rights of fathers, the stability of families, and the liberties of all American citizens under our republican form of government."
It goes on to state that:
"Our exceptional and free society simply cannot endure without the transmission of personal virtue, from one generation to the next, by means of nurturing, nuclear families comprised of sexually-faithful husbands and wives, fathers and mothers."
The group who penned the 'Vow' asks those who sign to publicly pledge fidelity not only to their spouses (obviously), but to not signing into effect any legislation that would threaten to redefine marriage as anything other than one man, one woman. They also include statements about child rearing ("children raised by a mother and a father together experience better learning, less addiction, less legal trouble, and less extramarital pregnancy"), "anti-human rights forms of totalitarian control" such as Sharia Law (Islam), reproductive rights ("robust childbearing and reproduction is beneficial to U.S. demographic, economic, strategic and actuarial health and security") and rights of the yet-born and children.
Here's a passage I particularly like:
"[I vow to uphold] Humane protection of women and the innocent fruit of conjugal intimacy – our next generation of American children – from human trafficking, sexual slavery, seduction into promiscuity, and all forms of pornography and prostitution, infanticide, abortion and other types of coercion or stolen innocence."
"Stolen innocence" truly is contributing to a disintegration of our society.
I read this vow and wondered, why is it so controversial to sign it? Politicians - including our President - do not hide their affiliations with special interest groups or "special" groups of people they'd like to show favor to in their legislation. So why is making it public that you plan to uphold the institution of marriage, thus protecting children's well-being in the process?
We live in an age of "do whatever you want." Men and women commit adultery at the drop of a hat (sometimes out of mere boredom) with no care to the consequences befalling their children. Or, if they are childless, the pain and suffering it causes the non-offending spouse, and the disrespect it shows for marriage itself. All in the name of selfish desire.
When people marry, they take a vow. It's in front of witnesses of some kind, who hear the couple pledge their fidelity which extends to the grave. How, then, is signing a paper that effectively says you're going to govern with the same "you" as made a verbal vow such a crime?
I don't get it.
Love,
Mom
Is signing a document that says one-man-one-woman marriage benefits both spouses and their children in a number of ways a bad thing?
There's an uproar about a "Marriage Vow" political officials have been presented with and their interest in or refutation of what it contains. Here's part of the preamble:
"Enduring marital fidelity between one man and one woman protects innocent children, vulnerable women, the rights of fathers, the stability of families, and the liberties of all American citizens under our republican form of government."
It goes on to state that:
"Our exceptional and free society simply cannot endure without the transmission of personal virtue, from one generation to the next, by means of nurturing, nuclear families comprised of sexually-faithful husbands and wives, fathers and mothers."
The group who penned the 'Vow' asks those who sign to publicly pledge fidelity not only to their spouses (obviously), but to not signing into effect any legislation that would threaten to redefine marriage as anything other than one man, one woman. They also include statements about child rearing ("children raised by a mother and a father together experience better learning, less addiction, less legal trouble, and less extramarital pregnancy"), "anti-human rights forms of totalitarian control" such as Sharia Law (Islam), reproductive rights ("robust childbearing and reproduction is beneficial to U.S. demographic, economic, strategic and actuarial health and security") and rights of the yet-born and children.
Here's a passage I particularly like:
"[I vow to uphold] Humane protection of women and the innocent fruit of conjugal intimacy – our next generation of American children – from human trafficking, sexual slavery, seduction into promiscuity, and all forms of pornography and prostitution, infanticide, abortion and other types of coercion or stolen innocence."
"Stolen innocence" truly is contributing to a disintegration of our society.
I read this vow and wondered, why is it so controversial to sign it? Politicians - including our President - do not hide their affiliations with special interest groups or "special" groups of people they'd like to show favor to in their legislation. So why is making it public that you plan to uphold the institution of marriage, thus protecting children's well-being in the process?
We live in an age of "do whatever you want." Men and women commit adultery at the drop of a hat (sometimes out of mere boredom) with no care to the consequences befalling their children. Or, if they are childless, the pain and suffering it causes the non-offending spouse, and the disrespect it shows for marriage itself. All in the name of selfish desire.
When people marry, they take a vow. It's in front of witnesses of some kind, who hear the couple pledge their fidelity which extends to the grave. How, then, is signing a paper that effectively says you're going to govern with the same "you" as made a verbal vow such a crime?
I don't get it.
Love,
Mom
July 11, 2011
July 11th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
We're being hit hard by the "recovered" economy. That's mostly because the economy is still a mess; very few jobs have been created despite our government officials saying the opposite.
Your dad is looking for work - which is about 100 times more difficult than it was even two years ago when I was last looking. You and I are going on Friday for our WIC interview. What's WIC? It's a government assistance program that provides food stamps and such to those in need. I don't have any pride about it because right now we can definitely use the help.
A report today said there are nearly 5 people per every job opening right now. A measly 18,000 jobs were created in June of this year, not nearly enough to provide for the millions of Americans now receiving aid like WIC and unemployment benefits.
A lot of people think (and this has been proven, to a small extent) that people who receive unemployment stay on it longer and without simultaneously looking for work. But that isn't everyone, and when there aren't jobs to even apply for, why would people even bother to look?
That's no excuse for people to sit around and smoke cigarettes, watch daytime t.v. and generally be lazy while they collect a check, mind you. I come from a liberal family, but they have a good work ethic. I had my first job at age 12 (working at a pet store informally), and my first legal job at 14. And, with the exception of a short stint in the state of Michigan - which currently pays benefits to 267,000 people and has been a terrible state for jobs for years - I've been employed full time ever since.
I like to work. I don't like to be idle; an idle mind is the devil's playground. The main thing I dislike now about work is not being with you during that time. However, my job makes me feel purposeful (at least enough of the time to defray some of my guilt).
My point is, having work to do is good for people. It gives them a feeling of self-worth, of pride in being able to provide for their families, being part of something bigger than their own small corner of the world, having the opportunity to contribute their own ideas, having people with shared experiences ready at hand.
When there is no work to obtain, is it any wonder people sit on their heels and waste time?
People want to work. Where are the jobs?
Love,
Mom
A funny post script: Last night, your dad and I scraped together all the change we could find in the house to buy a treat (ice cream). I paid 65 cents of it in pennies! Not that we need ice cream, of course, but it goes to show the kinds of ridiculous things people do when they're so broke...
We're being hit hard by the "recovered" economy. That's mostly because the economy is still a mess; very few jobs have been created despite our government officials saying the opposite.
Your dad is looking for work - which is about 100 times more difficult than it was even two years ago when I was last looking. You and I are going on Friday for our WIC interview. What's WIC? It's a government assistance program that provides food stamps and such to those in need. I don't have any pride about it because right now we can definitely use the help.
A report today said there are nearly 5 people per every job opening right now. A measly 18,000 jobs were created in June of this year, not nearly enough to provide for the millions of Americans now receiving aid like WIC and unemployment benefits.
A lot of people think (and this has been proven, to a small extent) that people who receive unemployment stay on it longer and without simultaneously looking for work. But that isn't everyone, and when there aren't jobs to even apply for, why would people even bother to look?
That's no excuse for people to sit around and smoke cigarettes, watch daytime t.v. and generally be lazy while they collect a check, mind you. I come from a liberal family, but they have a good work ethic. I had my first job at age 12 (working at a pet store informally), and my first legal job at 14. And, with the exception of a short stint in the state of Michigan - which currently pays benefits to 267,000 people and has been a terrible state for jobs for years - I've been employed full time ever since.
I like to work. I don't like to be idle; an idle mind is the devil's playground. The main thing I dislike now about work is not being with you during that time. However, my job makes me feel purposeful (at least enough of the time to defray some of my guilt).
My point is, having work to do is good for people. It gives them a feeling of self-worth, of pride in being able to provide for their families, being part of something bigger than their own small corner of the world, having the opportunity to contribute their own ideas, having people with shared experiences ready at hand.
When there is no work to obtain, is it any wonder people sit on their heels and waste time?
People want to work. Where are the jobs?
Love,
Mom
A funny post script: Last night, your dad and I scraped together all the change we could find in the house to buy a treat (ice cream). I paid 65 cents of it in pennies! Not that we need ice cream, of course, but it goes to show the kinds of ridiculous things people do when they're so broke...
July 6, 2011
July 6th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
I've been having so much fun away from work that I completely lost track of the date today. I had to look at the computer calendar to find out it is July 6th.
You, me and your dad have mostly just been hanging around. You go to bed early and we have some time together as adults, to eat dinner and watch a program.
On the fourth of July, we had no special plans. You did have a very patriotic dress to wear (a gift from auntie Becky). I made a red, white and blue garland that you couldn't stop admiring (thanks baby!), we baked shortcakes for dessert and dad had to scooter to the next city over to find some fireworks for us. But you loved the sparklers so much it was worth it.
We almost went to the zoo, but didn't. We tried to go swimming in the lake, but it was too smelly (from algae or something). I planned to take you strawberry picking, but changed my mind.
No matter. We had a great vacation anyway. When you feel like you're always somewhere else - work, visiting, in your own mind - then home is your getaway.
Love,
Mom
I've been having so much fun away from work that I completely lost track of the date today. I had to look at the computer calendar to find out it is July 6th.
You, me and your dad have mostly just been hanging around. You go to bed early and we have some time together as adults, to eat dinner and watch a program.
On the fourth of July, we had no special plans. You did have a very patriotic dress to wear (a gift from auntie Becky). I made a red, white and blue garland that you couldn't stop admiring (thanks baby!), we baked shortcakes for dessert and dad had to scooter to the next city over to find some fireworks for us. But you loved the sparklers so much it was worth it.
We almost went to the zoo, but didn't. We tried to go swimming in the lake, but it was too smelly (from algae or something). I planned to take you strawberry picking, but changed my mind.
No matter. We had a great vacation anyway. When you feel like you're always somewhere else - work, visiting, in your own mind - then home is your getaway.
Love,
Mom
June 30, 2011
July 4th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
This is your first Independence Day!
How are we celebrating? Well, we didn't make it to the all-American family farm in the heartland... and we won't be going to see any military family either... instead we're here in Madison, amongst the international students in university housing - ha!
Hopefully by today we have gone berry picking in the fields surrounding the city and I am making a gluten free strawberry shortcake for us all. Mmm.. gluten free biscuits. It has been my hope you would make it to one year without having sugar, so I will need to modify the recipe somewhat.
You have a lovely red, white and blue sundress to wear, from your Auntie Becky. And, if you get that messy, I have a felted star onesie for you, too. If I get a crafty bug in me before I post this, I may also make some paper banners and find us some (mild) fireworks.
If there are festivities downtown at the capital, perhaps we'll head down there, too. What says 'celebrate America!' better than a protest against American-despising liberals?
=)
Love,
Mom
This is your first Independence Day!
How are we celebrating? Well, we didn't make it to the all-American family farm in the heartland... and we won't be going to see any military family either... instead we're here in Madison, amongst the international students in university housing - ha!
Hopefully by today we have gone berry picking in the fields surrounding the city and I am making a gluten free strawberry shortcake for us all. Mmm.. gluten free biscuits. It has been my hope you would make it to one year without having sugar, so I will need to modify the recipe somewhat.
You have a lovely red, white and blue sundress to wear, from your Auntie Becky. And, if you get that messy, I have a felted star onesie for you, too. If I get a crafty bug in me before I post this, I may also make some paper banners and find us some (mild) fireworks.
If there are festivities downtown at the capital, perhaps we'll head down there, too. What says 'celebrate America!' better than a protest against American-despising liberals?
=)
Love,
Mom
June 28, 2011
June 30th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
You love to try and snatch your dad's glasses from his face. And he loves to watch you do it. Why? Because the look on your face during the attempt is one of pure honesty.
Unfortunately, you will come to know eventually that pure honesty is rare, if not impossibly found in humanity. Honesty often takes a mutated form - bluntness. Beneath the disguise of "just being honest," many people will say horrible things to each other. The idea being that the stark truth should never be offensive because, well, you can't argue with something being what it is. I, too, am guilty of thinking that the truth must be revealed, no matter how ugly.
Your dad and I aren't perfect. We're not great, or even good.. not by ourselves. God's grace has been given to us and that is the only reason we are motivated to act with gentleness toward one another.
It's refreshing, soul-invigorating to watch you interact with things and people with such pureness. When you grab my face and smush your nose into mine, I know it's because you love me and want to show it. No hidden agenda, no worry that your affections won't be interpreted correctly.
If I could say, "Lord, I thank, love and trust You" with as much honesty as you smush my nose, unbelief and anxiety would melt away. Thank you for being my daily reminder of this.
June 15, 2011
June 14th, 2011
Dear Sofia,
What makes a woman a woman? And how does she develop and retain her femininity when everything around her is screaming for her to be 'one of the guys?'
Feminism is a hot topic around here. Like certain pop stars, celebrityism, "reclaiming" of derogatory terms and other accepted cultural phenomena, I have never bought into "feminism" as it is presented today.
What is feminism? There's a two-part answer to that question: At its inception, feminism was simply the radical notion that women are different people than men. Meaning, they have different needs and wants, thought process, emotional behavior and method of relationship-building.
I agree completely with that theses. It's a very Christian idea, actually. The Bible speaks in terms of differences often, making great strides to convey that femininity is cultivated in a woman, not inborn. We can learn a lot about how God has created women differently from men by reading their biographical stories (Ruth, Naomi, Bathsheba, Mary, Martha, etc.).
The role of the Church in relationship to Christ is explicitly female; as His Bride, she is pliable and encouraged to behave adoringly (but not passively) toward Him. But the Church is not always loyal in her behavior, inviting rebuke from her Lord (who calls her a 'harlot' and notes her promiscuity).
If feminism today were packaged with those ideals - loyalty, steadfastness, thoughtfulness, gentleness, etc. - how lovely it would look!
Unfortunately, these terms in no way describe what women today are encouraged to be. Instead, we see in general secular culture that young women are emboldened to be 'independent' (though the meaning is obscured depending on the situation being addressed), rely on their emotions for decision making, act on a whim, be 'bold' (again, definition depends on the situation), and develop an overall sense of self-sufficiency, making personal desire the axis on which all major decisions turn.
If you think I'm being too hard on the culture-at-large, which does have its tiny glimmers of truth here and there, I need only point to some current examples for emphasis.
The first example is the recent walks being performed in honor of promiscuous women. Participants wear only pants and bras, writing on their stomach one word to signify their sexual wantonness, "sl--." (I don't even want to defame myself by typing the whole word.) The idea is that they will give sl-- a new connotation by being proud of the behavior it refers to. It's a twist on the reclamation of the n word by black people (which is also misguided; why not just phase out the term entirely instead of breathing new life into it?).
The second example is a movie out now called 'Bridesmaids.'* The protagonist (although she does more to antagonize the bride-to-be than be a character one wants to cheer for) is the reluctant maid-of-honor who, because of her self-loathing, seeks to sabotage her friend's upcoming wedding. The characters act decidedly more like men than ladies, lewdly spouting off about all kinds of sexual subjects, as well as grossly embarrassing themselves (and their husbands) with their thoughtless and inward-focused behaviors. Actually, they don't act like men, either; they act like teenage boys.
Apparently the message of the movie is "love your friends out of their behavior," meaning a true friend is one who stands by you through your darkest moments, hoping for you to snap out of it.
You can see the contrast between this picture of a woman - one who is allowed to behave impulsively, childishly until she 'gets it out of her system,' grows up and finds her friends are still anxiously waiting for her on the other side - and God's picture of womanhood - in which a woman is nurtured, chastened and imparted wisdom from those older women in her life who are truly feminine - are in the highest contrast.
Lord, let me be in the latter category, and be a feminine blessing to my baby girl.
*Which I have not seen except for a preview, but have read copious synopses of.
What makes a woman a woman? And how does she develop and retain her femininity when everything around her is screaming for her to be 'one of the guys?'
Feminism is a hot topic around here. Like certain pop stars, celebrityism, "reclaiming" of derogatory terms and other accepted cultural phenomena, I have never bought into "feminism" as it is presented today.
What is feminism? There's a two-part answer to that question: At its inception, feminism was simply the radical notion that women are different people than men. Meaning, they have different needs and wants, thought process, emotional behavior and method of relationship-building.
I agree completely with that theses. It's a very Christian idea, actually. The Bible speaks in terms of differences often, making great strides to convey that femininity is cultivated in a woman, not inborn. We can learn a lot about how God has created women differently from men by reading their biographical stories (Ruth, Naomi, Bathsheba, Mary, Martha, etc.).
The role of the Church in relationship to Christ is explicitly female; as His Bride, she is pliable and encouraged to behave adoringly (but not passively) toward Him. But the Church is not always loyal in her behavior, inviting rebuke from her Lord (who calls her a 'harlot' and notes her promiscuity).
If feminism today were packaged with those ideals - loyalty, steadfastness, thoughtfulness, gentleness, etc. - how lovely it would look!
Unfortunately, these terms in no way describe what women today are encouraged to be. Instead, we see in general secular culture that young women are emboldened to be 'independent' (though the meaning is obscured depending on the situation being addressed), rely on their emotions for decision making, act on a whim, be 'bold' (again, definition depends on the situation), and develop an overall sense of self-sufficiency, making personal desire the axis on which all major decisions turn.
If you think I'm being too hard on the culture-at-large, which does have its tiny glimmers of truth here and there, I need only point to some current examples for emphasis.
The first example is the recent walks being performed in honor of promiscuous women. Participants wear only pants and bras, writing on their stomach one word to signify their sexual wantonness, "sl--." (I don't even want to defame myself by typing the whole word.) The idea is that they will give sl-- a new connotation by being proud of the behavior it refers to. It's a twist on the reclamation of the n word by black people (which is also misguided; why not just phase out the term entirely instead of breathing new life into it?).
The second example is a movie out now called 'Bridesmaids.'* The protagonist (although she does more to antagonize the bride-to-be than be a character one wants to cheer for) is the reluctant maid-of-honor who, because of her self-loathing, seeks to sabotage her friend's upcoming wedding. The characters act decidedly more like men than ladies, lewdly spouting off about all kinds of sexual subjects, as well as grossly embarrassing themselves (and their husbands) with their thoughtless and inward-focused behaviors. Actually, they don't act like men, either; they act like teenage boys.
Apparently the message of the movie is "love your friends out of their behavior," meaning a true friend is one who stands by you through your darkest moments, hoping for you to snap out of it.
You can see the contrast between this picture of a woman - one who is allowed to behave impulsively, childishly until she 'gets it out of her system,' grows up and finds her friends are still anxiously waiting for her on the other side - and God's picture of womanhood - in which a woman is nurtured, chastened and imparted wisdom from those older women in her life who are truly feminine - are in the highest contrast.
Lord, let me be in the latter category, and be a feminine blessing to my baby girl.
*Which I have not seen except for a preview, but have read copious synopses of.
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